Payday Loans Prove Poor People are Dumb

If the proliferation of payday loan businesses, appliance rental companies and beauty parlors that specialize in foot care by goldfish in poor neighborhoods didn’t prove it, science finally has. A group from the Institute for Research on Poverty from the University of Wisconsin-Madison has released findings showing a definitive correlation between poverty and intelligence. The study followed farmers over a few years time and revealed that in times when they were flush with funds their decision making abilities were commensurately more acute but when they were at their poorest they lost an average of 13 IQ points, a significant number that often led them to drinking, verbal abuse and shaving of their nether regions. The researchers posit that  the diminished mental abilities may be related to a persons inability to concentrate upon too many factors at once as well as the deleterious effects of a diet consisting largely of corn dogs and bugles and Pepsi. In better times the farmers often made prudent, well thought out decisions regarding their lives, finances and business endeavors, putting a portion of their earnings aside for such rainy day needs as repairs, unexpected turns in the weather and mistresses. But when their finances were at their lowest they took advantage of payday loan and check-cashing services, smoked generic cigarettes, and visited houses of ill repute, occasionally mistaking gender and species.

The study also indicated that these surprising reversals in intelligence were not easily remedied as poverty itself often carries several increased demands upon one’s mental abilities, a downward spiral that only the people with the most resilient personalities and strong community networks can overcome. The poor who were well supported by their families and friends were able to quickly return to their previous mental acuity. Some of the most successful then reached out to others in their former predicament and bought them a half rack. Several other studies in the field of poverty had touched upon the issue of IQ and the poor but this was the first to conclusively link the two and demonstrate a causative relationship. The researchers have now undertaken a study to determine the well known link between power and a lack of morals. The study will take place in several payday loan businesses.