Even in these modern days, the times of unisex bathrooms and girdles for dudes of advanced age and advancing waistlines it should be understood that the feminists are wrong, men and women are not equal. Women got a shape way different than men, thank goodness. Men lumber, knuckles adrag, scratching, snorting, huffing and pooting, knocking stuff asunder and leaving bad smells. Women make their way through the world in a dance of flower fragrant grace, a swirl of becoming glances, Heddy Lamar tosses of the head and starry smiles. Equal pay my hairy bicep. The crewcut lassie that wears a flannel shirt and can heft five ten foot two by fours while walking the wall plates to assist with setting rafters all while swinging a full tool belt deserves that equal pay, or better, if she can wield a framing axe more proficiently than the foreman on the job. But equal pay just because the sky is the same color for her as it is for the lead bottomed plumber in the gravel strewn crawl space, bah humbug. On one hand the #womenagainstfeminism movement, (they got a facebook page, and a twitter presence, lookit up), seems like a bad idea. After all the girlies have been fighting since the nascence of time for a fair shake, now, in recent years they’ve made a few steps forward, like the right to vote, (in this country), the ability to play golf in most country clubs and the wearing of pants, (in more ways than one), why now are some of them posting photos and participating in these movements? The sites have a large number of adherents, women posting cutsie pics with signs reading, “I like being a robot.”, and “Thanks for the beatings.”. Can 12,000 + ladies really enjoy being chattel? Again, on first glance, it sounds like bad reasoning. But is it really? If the movement grew that fast, two months, there must be some logic to it. And the more we thought about it, the more it did make sense, from this man’s point of view. We never really liked those feminists anyway, smoking our cigars, swilling our scotch, wearing our shirts. Well maybe the wearing our shirts wasn’t so bad. But taking our jobs, that really grates. Until these feminist came along men were the chefs, womenthey were just cooks. Men managed and assistant managed the convenience stores, women were sometimes clerks, but night manager, no dice. The trades were a mans world, where the coffee cups were filled with an acrid syrup and never washed. Where the Rigid tool calender hung proudly on the wall and invective filled the air. Then the feminists wanted in, and along with em came OSHA, and PC talk and it became gauche to heat your burrito on the engine block or scratch your back on the door jamb. All the fun done gone. So lets all go backwards, we like the idea. #womenagainstfeminism, may your movement prosper and grow strong. May all your members play with Barbies and wear baby doll dresses. May you beat the clothes clean upon rocks and hot iron them to a fine, straight crisp for us, your masters. May you walk barefoot and subservient that us menfolk may hunt, fish, gamble and poot at our leisure.
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