Fifth Cain Accuser Comes Forward

The trials of presidential hopeful Herman Cain have begun to exponentially magnify as yet another person comes forward with a sordid tale of sensual harassment by the Republican front runner. Emboldened by the courage and tenacity of fourth accuser Sharon Bialek,  J.D., a young Californian who wishes to remain anonymous now claims that during a 2006 visit to San Diego Cain made an overture far more disturbing and in much plainer English than has been previously reported.

According to J.D., the incident took place at a luncheon held for young entrepreneurs in May of 2006 at the Hotel Coronado. The two were seated next to each other at the banquet and had been casually discussing the current presidential candidate’s efforts as CEO of the popular Godfathers Pizza chain when the young entrepreneur mentioned the difficulties in making an inroads in the competitive food service field. At that point, J.D. claims, Cain put his little finger in his own mouth, wetting it with saliva, then proceeded to tweedle it in the young person’s ear. “It’s just like a wet Willy.” Cain said. “Making the your first insertion into the marketplace is the first and hardest hurdle,” Cain then said, “and after that it just gets easier each time and place.”

The incident was profoundly disturbing and even after drying the ear with a napkin, J.D. felt as if it wouldn’t come clean, in fact to this day, still shivers at the remembrance. For the time being, content that the story is out, J.D. is not joining Sharon Bialek or others in possible legal actions but has stated that that option is always a possibility.