News

Brian Lied, Big Deal

brian williamsSo one of our silk suited spokespersons, Brian Williams,  lied, big deal. If your momma didn’t teach you to never trust a suit, you shoulda learned it in grade school. All the news shills do it. Think Geraldo Rivera, (nee Gerald Michael Riviera, everyone is someone else)  ever took a bullet, nah, like every other slick he let the poor fight the war while he cheered them on from The Green Zone. Granted, some real journalists get in the thick of it and don’t have to lie about their experiences, often because someone else tells their tale after their death.

Just add it up, we ain’t stoopid. Watch an hour of news on any of the major outlets and whadda ya get. Placebos and puffery, some pretty face with a mic standing on a street corner talking about the explosion and how even now, hours later, she fears her hair or make-up will be ruint. A few minutes about the upcoming release of a new action film and an interview with its hunky star. How your pet really, really cares about you, (He doesn’t, he just wants a few kibbles and the toilet seat left up.) A piece about how Samsung is spying on you through your TV but nothing about how the government already knows everything and wants to punish anyone who exposes their own dirty little secrets.

 

So Brian Williams lied, big deal. Walter Cronkite shilled for Winston cigarettes. Katy Couric is cute as a button. Weather porn is all over. Sean Hannity wears a girdle. Bill O’Reilly can’t control his temper and has a thing for the loofah. Rush Limbaugh is a, well what can one say about Mr. Limbaugh that he hasn’t already proven by opening his mouth. Point is Williams lied because he had to. Salesmen are always sizzling up the product.

That’s the news we get, it’s also what we deserve, uncurious couch potatoes that we are, slouching our opinionated selves in front of the tv, gorging on cool ranch Doritos and watching the antics of nimrods like those Alaskan bush league people, when all it really takes to learn what’s going on in the world is to push a button and catch Democracy Now! or the Al Jazeera network, where one gets more information in a minute than a full day of Al Roker. A flagpole isn’t vertical unless checked from more than one angle.

On an aside, The Yellow Press is not afraid of a lie. It is recognizing falsehoods that keep us from falling into the Venus flytraps of life. Want to be a reporter for us, Click Here, liars welcome.

 

 

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